Recently a friend experienced a situation that made her want to scream and punch a hole in the wall. She did neither. She had enough integrity to not allow a person or circumstance to determine her course of action. Regardless of who you are, where you were born, whether you are rich or poor, sick or healthy you have to live with who you are. You have to wake up every day and still be you.
I went through a time that was pretty bleak. I remember telling my husband that if we didn’t have children I would have become either a drug addict or an alcoholic because I couldn’t stand to be in my own skin. The kiddos kept me as sane as I could have been at the time. I was never suicidal or anything, I just hated the person I had become. I was miserable. And lonely. (For some reason, people don’t enjoy being around an angry, blame-everybody-but-yourself kind of person!) It was, as you might imagine, not a fun place to be. It took me more than 12 years to escape that and re-create myself.
The point is, it is important to consider how much time, money and effort you put into the upkeep of yourself. A little bit at a time you can wear away, the same way your car might start giving you trouble if you don’t keep up with things like oil changes. Keep yourself in good running condition so you can be confident that you won’t break at the first sign of trouble. Reevaluate your areas of weakness – not once a year or every six months, but daily – and find a way to strengthen them. It is far easier to clean up a few stones than it is to move a bolder. Put the work in when the problems are small and manageable so that you can face whatever comes with confidence.
Make yourself the type of person you like and can trust. Pay attention to you. At the end of the day, you’re all you’ve got. Others can support and encourage you but you’re the one who has to keep you going. Be confident in your foundation. When life challenges you, know that you are unshakable.